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State Of The Trout: Missed Deadline, Spooky Story Time, and The Next Book Recap

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Hey there, it’s your old pal, Jenny, coming to you live from the late-stage capitalist dystopia that is the United States of America. All of my grand plans for bringing my manuscript in on deadline got washed down the drain after last week’s newsworthy events sent me into a depression tailspin that was also experienced by basically everyone in the entire country. I’m sure productivity levels were through the roof last week, let me tell you.

Anyway, what that means for you is that the blog posts will continue to be…not here until I get the freaking book done. I’m so close. Like, a chapter and an epilogue close.

But I do have another Spooky Story Time for you!

 

This one is about my two visits to the Sorrel-Weed House in Savannah, GA. Yes, it really is a half-hour long video. It’s edited down from fifty minutes. I just have a lot to say about paranormal investigations, okay?

It’s also time to figure out what we’re recapping next. I had this wild fantasy of never recapping a book ever again but since Handbook For Mortals is over and the sequel hasn’t come out yet, I’ve had a lot of people saying, “You should recap [insert book here] next!” What we’re gonna do is this. We’re going to nominate books using this handy form:

 

I’ll leave nominations open until October 19, at which point the three books with the most nominations will be moved to semi-finals voting. If you fill out the optional question about why it would be a good fit, I may use your anonymous answer in support of your title if it advances to the finals.

That’s all the news that’s fit to print. Wish me luck as I head back into the writing cave.

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Here for the first time because you’re in quarantine and someone on Reddit recommended my Fifty Shades of Grey recaps? Welcome! Consider checking out my own take on the Billionaire BDSM genre, The Boss. Find it on AmazonB&NSmashwords, iBooks, and Radish!

25 Comments

  1. Alana Skye
    Alana Skye

    You are awesome, and I speak for all your fans when I say please look after yourself and practice self care, we can wait for your next book a while longer!

    October 3, 2018
    |Reply
  2. Michael
    Michael

    Everyone: Before you suggest a book for Jenny to review, look up Modelland by Tyra Banks and ask yourself if you shouldn’t suggest t h a t book. 😉

    October 3, 2018
    |Reply
  3. Zev
    Zev

    Thank you for writing that you went into a depression tailspin–the same thing happened to me, and I had no clue, and now I do, and I feel so much better being able to name it. Please take care of yourself!
    Your writing is wonderful. I’m rereading “Say Goodbye to Hollywood,” which is one of my favorite books of yours.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
  4. Amber
    Amber

    If it makes you miserable, you don’t have to recap any more books. As much as I love your snarky humor, I can live without it if it’s that bad. 🙁

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
  5. Chris
    Chris

    Well, there are a LOT of bad books out there. IDK, I don’t exactly expect Tyra Banks to pull off a great read at her first try. I guess I’d love for the new book to have the same contemporary and cultural relevance as FSoG and HfM had, if that makes sense?

    What I loved about FSoG was that it was sold as ‘a love story’ and you pointed out everything that was wrong, not only with the book, but with our society and views towards men, women, gender, relationships, sexuality, etc that could allow such a story to be actually perceived as romantic. What I loved about HfM was the way your bullshit alarm went off the first time you read about her being kicked off of the NYT list, and how you brought all Lanye’s con methods into the light. With Appolonia I kind of missed the relevance, but maybe that’s because I live in Europe and Appolonia was not a thing here, or at least not to my knowledge.

    In any way I’m looking forward to new recaps immensely. Not looking forward to the immediate loss of productivity but okay.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
    • Michael
      Michael

      Speaking as a fellow European, I don’t think Appolonia was ever really a thing in the USA either. Though I might be wrong, of course.

      And the thing about Tyra Banks is that her book is probably as famous as HfM is, since it actually became a NYT besteller legitimately (though only for the first week, when the public hadn’t read it yet, haha). And the thing about it is that, well… It’s the kind of book where you can really tell that the author thought “I’ll write a novel! Anybody can do *that.*”

      October 5, 2018
      |Reply
      • Chris
        Chris

        “When the public hadn’t read it yet” hahahaha

        October 6, 2018
        |Reply
  6. I love Jealous Haters Book Club, and I’m excited that you’re going to continue! Off the top of my head I can’t think of a title to suggest. This will require some thought.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
  7. If you go “Authors Behaving Badly”, you could recap Faleena Hopkins’ garbage book, Cocky Roomie.

    OR, my personal favourite for abuse passed off as romance, A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Mass.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
  8. Kristin Bigz
    Kristin Bigz

    In the Paranormal Romance genre you could also do Tiger’s Curse by Colleen Houck. Otherwise known as Twilight with Tigers.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
  9. Saint_Sithney
    Saint_Sithney

    Part of me is tempted to nominate a book I proofed. It’s up on Amazon, with two 5-Star reviews, though a cursory look shows that the only thing that my hours of work on the manuscript did was standardize the capitalization, and induce the writer to add in section breaks… which were then added willy-nilly without regard to sense.

    But the author just wrote a really bad, poorly constructed, illogical book that weighs in at nearly 400 pages. They didn’t try to scam anyone, and while the list price is ridiculous ($12 for an incoherent mess that is roughly as entertaining as watching a toilet flush?), their private opinion that they wrote a masterpiece is fine. There’s a bit of sadistic sense that I suffered through the goddamn thing, so others should suffer too, and a bit of vindication for the editors and proofreaders of these train-wreck novels, because past a certain point, it is ghostwriting, not editing. But yeah… can’t really be a “jealous hater” for a really obscure bad book that has sold fewer than 100 copies.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
  10. Jean
    Jean

    Loving these ghost stories! I don’t know what exactly I believe, but my last house left me more receptive to the idea of spirits than I was before. I like hearing your experiences and comparing them to my own! Thank you, Jenny !

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
  11. Evil!Blonde Bitch
    Evil!Blonde Bitch

    Hush, Hush by Becca Fitzpatrick is a bestselling YA novel from a while back that had a love interest who was WORSE than Chedward when it comes to abuse. He blatantly sexually harasses the heroine in front of a classroom, and she’s embarrassed, and he claims SHE LIKES IT, and of course he’s right and they fall in Twu Wuv eventually and I threw the goddamn book across the room. It’s bad. It’s fucking bad.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
    • Tez Miller
      Tez Miller

      They’re actually making a film of HUSH, HUSH now. About ten years too late to grab the audience they want.

      October 4, 2018
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      • Amy
        Amy

        I actually did like Hush Hush when i first read it at 15, but even back then I was annoyed by the sexism in the book.

        October 5, 2018
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      • Evil!Blonde Bitch
        Evil!Blonde Bitch

        WHAT THE FUCK
        *keyboard smash*

        I’m disproportionately upset by this. After this awful week, I really don’t want to see sexual harassment and stalking and gaslighting ROMANTICIZED in a teen movie. I just… I… Jesus Christ, doesn’t Hollywood have an OUNCE of sensitivity and remembering the #MeToo movement?!!

        October 7, 2018
        |Reply
    • Amy
      Amy

      If we’re gonna do a Becca Fitzpatrick book, it should probably be Black Ice, which has an extremely low rating on goodreads. Even her fans think the book is fucking terrible.

      October 5, 2018
      |Reply
  12. Perfidiousness
    Perfidiousness

    The newest trend online is to hate JK Rowling with the heat of a thousand suns. Recap HP and be sure to bring up every tiny instance of something that might be considered even slightly unwoke, and tear her to shreds over it. Your readership will go through the roof.

    October 4, 2018
    |Reply
    • Jenny Trout
      Jenny Trout

      Yeah, but if I did that, what would I have left to do on Twitter?

      October 4, 2018
      |Reply
      • Perfidiousness
        Perfidiousness

        Fight the nazi menace?

        October 5, 2018
        |Reply
  13. MyDog’sPA
    MyDog’sPA

    I’m at a mini Steampunk convention with my wife. She’s launching her steampunk novel this weekend. Definitely not bad enough to be JH material, and the reviews so far have been genuinely positive. (We did get a good quality editor and followed her advice) I just wish Jenny had a guest book review category as I’d love to get some quality feedback at her level. Trouble is, Jen’s reviews of a good quality book wouldn’t be as entertaining as a “prime” JH-standard book.

    Sigh.

    October 6, 2018
    |Reply
  14. Tez Miller
    Tez Miller

    I nominated Sylvia Day’s BARED TO YOU.

    October 6, 2018
    |Reply
    • I tried that one and had to DNF it when what’s her bucket revealed her traumatic childhood past. I mean, just, no. Ew.

      October 7, 2018
      |Reply
  15. Nat
    Nat

    Guys – I just submitted it but everyone needs to look into – Save the Pearls. It is a dumpster fire of racism with the “ugly” protagonist who has to has to wear blackface to hide her “disgusting porcelain skin”. Also she bangs a catman? I have no idea what was happening in this book and I need Jenny to explain it to me!

    October 8, 2018
    |Reply
  16. merry
    merry

    Are you feeling hopeless because of the whole Kavanaugh situation? I understand that. I feel pretty hopeless myself and I don’t even live in USA. We have grown a lot in the last few decades but it’s not nearly enough. I keep thinking that nobody can stop the progress and the world must change for better, but it still seems very bleak.

    October 8, 2018
    |Reply

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