I will be taking the next week off from blogging and social media to focus on my mental health and consider the future of my career. Nightmare Born will still update on Tuesday.
Your One Stop Procrastination Shop
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I will be taking the next week off from blogging and social media to focus on my mental health and consider the future of my career. Nightmare Born will still update on Tuesday.
Take care of yourself!! After all that has happened in the last few days, you deserve to step back and focus on your own mental health.
Rest and be good to yourself. Good vibes from Finland.
Take care.
I’ll keep you in my thoughts
Do whatever you have to do to feel better
You probably won’t see this until next week when you come back to social media, but I’d still like to write it today, when I’m seeing this post for the first time. I saw your post yesterday about coincidences and I want to say: “I get it. I don’t get it.” I get that a terrible thing was deliberately done to you, and I get that I can’t possibly understand how that makes you feel beyond angry and hurt (the “I don’t get it” of my statement.) I’m guessing that post isn’t here anymore for reasons similar to why you’re taking time off.
I came to your blog about a year ago and have voraciously devoured all of your posts, recaps, and writing advice. I love your work here so much that I checked out your other blog (I was the one who asked for Tarot advice). And I bought the first book in your Boss series. (I haven’t read it yet because I’m balancing a full time job with a very active 19-mo-old and a secret writing hobby. But I can’t wait to get into it!)
I’m not very into social media (understatement) and I don’t participate well in it (read: almost never participate in it), which is why I’ve never posted here until now. But I want you to know how much I love and appreciate your writing. You get a lot of supportive comments here from other people, but today and now, I’d like to add my voice. You’re terrific. You’re YOU. And that’s awesome.
Come back soon!
I hope you’ll be ok, Jenny. You are a great writer and you seem like a good person who stands up against injustice.
I, too, saw the comments come up in my email but when I came here to see what had happened I got a 404 page. Jenny — if you see this before the end of your hiatus — I want you to know something: I GET IT. I suffer from mental health issues, mostly anxiety and PTSD (survivor of narcissistic personalities and child abuse). I have always questioned and doubted myself, and just the wrong words from the wrong people can send me spiraling downward. I know where you are right now, in your head. This is why I wish I knew you better because I would jump in my car and come to you and say to your face, “FUCK THE HATERS.”
You have no idea how much you have inspired me to get back on MY feet, after all the shit I’ve been through and the self-doubt and self-loathing. I had visions of being a professional author 30 years ago but because of the situations I was in, I had to smother that dream. I even had to choke back who I was on the spiritual level. Only when I began to catch your Tarot broadcasts did I begin to pull out my own cards and found that the talent I thought was gone was still there, waiting for me. And I’m writing again. Not just the freelance ghostwriting but for my OWN work.
It’s funny, I’m typing this and ELO’s “Stepping Out” (from their Out of the Blue album) is playing. Talk about a song about hope and not giving up. Anyway, I do not want to see you crushed by these people. Please. I know how hard it is, we are so fragile and can be forced to retreat so easily because we don’t want to be burned again, but you are such an incredible force of nature. You have made me laugh and empowered me when I was at my lowest, you made me believe in myself again — and that’s why I’m here, to pay it back. I do not want to see you questioning yourself, your career, your future.
There are a lot of mean, backbiting, hateful people in the publishing world (from what I’ve seen as I sit on the sidelines, waiting for my chance to get in the game); even my client has people who attack everything that is put out because he had a former ghostwriter plagiarize a fanfic and he didn’t know it until the original author’s followers descended upon him. Now, they spread it everywhere that he is a plagiarist — even about the stories I’VE written for him, which makes me want to jump on them and scream, “Shut up, bitch — that’s 100% original because *I* wrote it!”
Bottom line, people suck. You have to brush that dirt off your shoulders and keep being you. Head up, moving forward, doing your thing. That’s why you have so many who love and support you. I live alone and all my friends are miles and hours away, and I rarely have human contact (sometimes, that’s a good thing), but it pains me to see someone like you, who gives so much joy and strength to others, brought low by this kind of bullshit, doubting yourself and feeling sad. You’re allowed to take a break and retreat but don’t do it because you were forced back by bullies.
So, get the self-care you need but do come back, and show them that they will not win, they will not keep you down. Come back fighting, even if it’s in the form of walking past them with deaf ears, head up and with a demeanor of determination.
I send you healing energy, unconditional love, and empowerment.
Namaste, sister.
I don’t mean to derail your post, but I’m in a pretty awful situation of my own right now so I have to ask while the opportunity presents itself, how did you get work as a ghostwriter? I’ve never been able to figure out how people find jobs in that or copy writing, or basically any job that involves writing that isn’t just straight up making your own novels or movies.
Try joining fiverr. That’s how I got started in ghostwriting 😀
I think I replied to this wrong or something but I went to Upwork and that’s where I found my current client. I’ve worked for a few others but this one wants me long term because I turn out good work (4.5-5 star ratings). Upwork takes a small cut but otherwise you can do really well without signing up for a paid account.
You’ll probably read this in a week but I’m writing this today: I’m sorry for what the person has done to you. In fact, it makes me angry.
I know from personal experience – since my childhood at home and at school and later also professionally – how it is to be treated awfully and then gaslighted. I had a professor partially steal my work and taking credit, a thing he has done to many, many people and noone will talk about it. So I understand your pain certainly to a level. I can’t claim I fully understand because that wouldn’t be fair to you or what you feel. It always sounds wrong to claim you know exactly how it feels (no matter what IT is) so I say I certainly understand quite a bit.
From your tweet, I already feared that somebody had left an awful comment or email and seeing that the blog was gone this morning, later reading a comment down here, my suspicions were confirmed.
I want you to know that you were right in feeling what you felt and thinking what you thought without a shadow of a doubt.
I’ve seen people do this kind of abusive shit, in “real life” and online as well, and I know their tactics. I know how they can tug at doubts and camouflage their BS in uncertainty and the good will of people.
I believe you. I know your suspicions were right.
Take care and take your well deserved rest.
I’ll be thinking of you.
I don’t have anything to say the rest of these wonderful commenters have, but I think you’re incredible. You’ve created a community here where I’m not just entertained and informed by your thought-provoking posts, but by the people who read and comment and love your work. It feels like an internet family; even if I don’t know the names of the regulars, I know the replies will be full of supportive and intelligent (and often hilarious) commentary. I’m not sure what happened between when I read the coincidences post yesterday and now, but if some nasty people invaded this community, I’m so so sorry; you don’t deserve that, and it’s awful to have a safe space turned hostile. But you have our respect and support; you’re an absurdly talented writer and my favorite blogger, and I look forward to seeing you when things are better. In the meantime, take care of yourself and spend time with the people who love you, knowing that you’ll come back online to your fan family.
This- this is what I wanted to say. I missed the blog that was taken down, so I don’t know exactly what happened. However, a person doesn’t build a community like this one by accident. You are awesome, Jenny, on so many levels, and when you’re questioning it (which I totally, totally understand) just remember that all the awesome regulars on this blog are reflecting you. Each in their own snarky, smart, and smart-ass ways, but still reflecting what you bring to us.
Take care of yourself however you need to, but don’t forget to listen to the people that are here all the time. It’s easy to dismiss the voices you hear all the time in favor of new ones- I do it a lot- but we know you better than some fly-by-night troll. And we look forward to hearing from you again when you’re ready.
Echoing Elizabeth and Forest: I really enjoy this place. I am so sorry anything bad happened here, and I will send good thoughts so you can feel well soon. You are so valued and loved.
Oh, and for what it’s worth I immediately got all your books — under ArmIntrout — out from the library after reading your post. Really enjoying The Turning, and having picked up your voice in the fantastic books you’ve written under Barnette and Trout, I can’t imagine mistaking it for anyone else. Even over a decade ago, your skill shines through the pages, and I’m looking forward to reading the rest of your books, under all your names.
You will probably not see this for a while but I felt the need to post. I must have missed something because I was away late last night but here’s what I’ve learned from my experience with my little online author/sort of stalker: if you haven’t experienced it then your opinion is worth squat.
No one who hasn’t been in the situation can fully understand what can happen to you. You do what you have to do to keep yourself happy. That’s it, protect yourself.
But…
That is one nasty, manipulative, gas-lighting bitch.
Jenny, I hope you’re OK, and good luck.
I hope you get through this, realizing that you are an incredible writer with a lot of passion, talent, and grit. I hope that you get to a point where you can see yourself the way your fans do.
I don’t comment on a lot of things online, but I just waned to say that your blog and The Boss have changed my life irrevocably for the better. I really appreciate the good things you’ve done here and in your books and I know I’m not the only one.
Take care of yourself.
My best.
I hope you’re ok and you need no apologies for taking care of yourself. I first found your vampire book when it came out. I am from west Michigan also and wanted to support. I’ve followed you since then. Feel better and take care of you.
I really love your writing (all forms!) and I appreciate you. You are a person who makes me feel better about the world, and I want your world to be a positive space for you. I hope you can find that.
Sending much good energy your way. Your writing means a lot to me, and I believe you and support you.
My inbox is always open if you need anything.
You may not read this for a while, but take care of yourself. You are a truly inspiring person and writer and you make my day brighter with your words.
I’ve just been through the academic version of this, Jenny. Take care of your head.
But.
BUT.
THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS WILL NOT SILENCE OR SHAME YOU.
We won’t let them.
Hope the time away gives you what you need. Sending you only the best wishes and gratitude for your fantastic writing. ❤️ Take care.
((HUGS)) Take care of you.
Others have eloquently stated that which I came here to wholeheartedly comment. Please take care of yourself.
I often read your books while waiting for the bus (meaning a lot), and after reading a new book I wound up hating–yours are much better and in those instances, reminders that books can be good. Thank you for writing them. Thank you for your 50SoG recaps, which I read and laugh at still. When I first read them, I learned a lot about the world and myself. I’ve been reading your blog since 2012. Thank you for the amazing “Buffy” recaps. They delight me to no end and often validate my own opinions, and have introduced me to the show again in a more critical way. #6 Xander being a Nice Guy was a new opinion, but oooh it’s so clear now. And #2 Giles being in love with Buffy blew my mind. Now I can barely unsee it.
You’re brilliant. I admire you. I often tell people to read your books and blog. One of my proudest moments was getting my mom to read The Boss (first book). “It’s like 50SoG, but funnier,” I lamely summarized, trying to drum up curiosity. I gave her my hard copy two weeks later. She hung on to it for five weeks, which I found very funny at the time for my own reasons. When she gave me it back, all she said, blushing, was “It was really good but it was…repetitive.” I grinned, knowing exactly what she meant. “Yeah, I noticed that.” Years later, she mentioned The Boss again and said she “only liked 50SoG because someone lent it to me.” “Okay,” I responded, a little confused. Later, I got what she was really trying to say. She’s read other books of yours; she refers to them and I seriously think she’s checked out your blog. I’m kind of surprised, but really glad. (For the record, when she started referring to -Das Sporking’s- recaps of Twilight and 50SoG?! These were blink and you miss it, but, -mind blown.- I hadn’t thought she’d check them out at all, or that she’d be annoyed. I learned a lot about her and was happy. They’re some of my favorite recaps too.)
So all in all, you’re awesome, and thank you.
Responding to my own comment as a Part II because I forgot something incredibly, incredibly important:
You tweeted one day about Nostalgia Chick, in 2015 I think, talking about how cool she was. I clicked the link out of curiosity and was quickly absorbed. Between her videos and your writing tips that you seamlessly blend into your recaps, as well as your Don’t Do This: Author Edition, I have become a far better writer than I could have imagined a few years ago. Lindsay Ellis was still involved with the Company that Shall Not be Named, and I discovered them too. While I wasn’t a fan of most of their humor, the videos I liked and laughed at nonetheless became a lot of my comedic influences in subtle ways. I reference the videos of theirs I like a lot without meaning to. I use the term Big Lipped Alligator a lot, especially when editing my own works. So, I really like her and I’m so glad you introduced me. Thank you for that, and for providing so many wonderful writing tips.
I wish you the best because you deserve everything good and awesome that the world has to give. Finding your blog was the best thing that happened to me last year. Love and hugs from Poland!
I’m so sorry that you’re going through all of this, and glad that you are taking the time to take care of yourself. I’ve never met you, but you mean a lot to me!
I came across your blog a few years ago now, and it has been a lifeline at times. Your writing has had a huge positive impact in my life. And, no matter what you decide is best for you going forward, I will be forever grateful to you for that.
Thinking of you and wishing you healing and happiness.
I’m a huge fan but I’m a big ol dummy here…what….happened…?
Wishing you all the best! <3
Aargh, this sucks. I hope you’ll feel better soon!
I have not commented here very often, largely because I just come for your amazing writing and other people make much smarter and funnier comments than I can.
But when I saw this post, I felt compelled to lend you my support, for whatever it’s worth. I understand the need to take a break, but I sincerely hope you don’t stop writing or blogging. You have a unique and intelligent, fair and just voice that I think really needs to be heard.
Also, your sense of humour just slays me.
Whatever you choose to do, I wish you nothing but the best because that is exactly what you deserve. But I do hope you will keep writing and blogging because your amazing voice needs to be heard. You are a fantastic author whose writing I enjoy reading, and you are an inspiration to others who want to write.
You matter to a lot of people, and I hope the bullshit doesn’t get you down.
Take care of yourself!
I discovered you when the Handbook fiasco broke; your Twitter rundown was must-read stuff. And I first came here for the JHBC recaps of Handbook – no way was I gonna buy that garbage fire myself, so I was grateful you were up for taking one for the team on that front, as were.
Your sense of humour is fabulous – it meshes so well with my own, I just find your blog a total joy to read. And you just seem like a really badass person.
I hate that something’s happened that’s got you questioning your future career. That’s BS – it’s not right that someone’s actions have you debating over your doing what you love.
I hope that your time away helps, and that you find a way forward that’s best for *you*. Again, you’re a badass. I’m totally confident that you will.
Look after yourself, girl. <3
Hope you’re ok, Jenny. Take care
Hey Jenny! I do not comment often. But, I wanted to reach out and tell you to take care of yourself. Every thing that has happened is truly terrible and I am so very sorry this has happened to you and continues to impact your health.
While I cannot comment on the other persons motives please know that the entire situation is garbage and you deserve better.
Your voice, blog, humor and writing have meant a lot to myself and others over the years and we all appreciate and love you. I hope you continue to keep doing it. But, if you choose not to we all support you.
Big fucking hugs!!!
Thank you for all the thought, humour, and talents you’ve shared with us. Best wishes for your time of reflection and recuperation.
Hey Jenny,
Social media is one of those weird things that make people feel like they know an individual after 150K tweets and 54+ hours of listening to her words. I found your Sophie series in October through the Audible Romance package. However, I put off listening to The Boss for a while because similarly-ranked “o-o-o-omg” steamy books had let me down. All the romance books I found seemed to be either a well-written slow-burn or 99% smut— both of which I love without shame — but it’s surprisingly difficult for me to find both in one story.
As Leslie Knope would say: Jenny, you beautiful tropical fish, you write both.
You create characters who are complex while also writing the hottest goddamn sex scenes out there. I cannot begin to put into words how refreshing it is to find a female protagonist in a romance series who likes to be slapped in the face during sex and remains feminist as fuck throughout. I binged the series in about a month (it would have been sooner but grad school was kicking my ass) and I cannot wait to have time to dive back into it again.
I just wanted to reach out and express how much your books and characters have meant to me. As someone who struggles with depression, anxiety, and in the past had suicidal thoughts, your Sophie books have been some of the most impactful books I have read in years. I sobbed during The Baby and The Girlfriend at both the devastating parts and out of relief. I’m one of those awful people whose anxiety prompts her to do things like skip to the end of a story just to make sure, that like, Neil was still around.
Thank you for your wonderful characters. Thank you for writing women who are vocal about their opinions. Thank you for writing flawed characters who grow. Thank you for not shying away from controversial topics.
Just.
Thank you.
I don’t normally comment but I want to add my words to the ever-growing collection of well-wishes.
Jenny, your words always brighten my day. Your’re insightful, thoughtful, funny as fuck, and clever. I’ve been reading your blog since 2012-13 and I’m always excited when there’s a new post. I don’t have a twitter account anymore but I still read your feed. I read your words because you are terrific. You’re talented as hell and have a unique perspective that I can’t get anywhere else. I even read The Boss and I’m not into erotica! (I love the characters).
All that said, I hope for the best for you. Take care of yourself and your family. Do what is best for your mental and emotional health. I want to say, “Don’t let the bullies and haters bring you down!”, but there’s only so much a person can take before the burden is too much. Do whatever you need to be happy and healthy. We’ll all be here for you when you are ready.
<3
You rock. I’ve loved your blog since late 2013. I love your recaps and all your advice. Please take care of yourself and I hope you’re back to creating cool shit soon. <3
I wanted to say I’m a better person for reading your blogs/tweets etc. I have learned so much, been prompted to look into issues I’d never have thought about without you. I realised I had a toxic friend in my life and fixed it. I have the words for stuff I knew wasn’t right but didn’t know how to express. I even recently pointed out to my hubby that his work mate had just managed to hit 3 red flags in one story about him and his girlfriend, and that hubby really needs to keep an eye on that couple. All from your writing.
You’ve helped me become a better person and I wanted to say thank you for that.
I also love your books. Take care of yourself <3
Love you Jenny, your blog has been a bright spot for me for many years now. Take care of yourself.
Upworks.
Hi, I’m a lurker most of the time, but I want to add my voice to the growing choir of praises.
I started reading your blog since 50 shades, and how I loved your intelligent and funny breakdown of the worst books ever. You were putting into words why I hated the series, but couldn’t say myself.
And you became an inspiration. I also suffer from mental health issues, and seeing how you have suffered in the past and how depression still flares up from time to time.. it makes me feel for you because I know how much it sucks. Still, you managed to run a family and doing the stuff you love, it’s just incredible.
Currently, I’m in a rough spot myself, with two young kids (a 2 year old an a 4 month old) and my own depression giving me a hard time. And I know how hard it is to do what’s right and healthy for you. Therefore, I applaud you for taking time to be nice to yourself (at least, I hope you are. Because suddenly I get this picture of you beating yourself up over this and in agony from all the nasty things a scumbag brain can throw at you. I really hope you get to do some selfcare and selflove. But if that isn’t possible, that’s okay too.)
Hopefully, all our loving comments can drown those of the haters. You are awesome, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Wishing you the best! Hugs if you want.
I read every post here, and have since the early days of the first Fifty Shades take-down. I don’t often comment but I read the post you removed when it was there and as a writer myself I undetsstand exactly what you’re going through. I was plagiarised once and it was a wierd feeling, though one I was able to laugh off. I just want to remind you that you are in the right you are the originator, you are the creative one. All this shadow can do is copy you. You are a success in your own right, and she cannot take from you the satisfaction of what you have done, and the fans you have earned. Please see yourself truly. If you ever got to watch an incredibly successful and funny BBC sitcom called ‘Porridge’, set inside a prison, you’ll have heard this before, but I say it to you: nils carborundum – don’t let the bastards grind you down.
I’d had my own social media hiatus and had missed Jimmy Thomas showing his ugly. (unfriending him and changing the cover with him on it) and then learned about the other stuff. ((Hugs))
Thank you for being a little light on the internet that keeps my own darkness away. Thank you for being such an amazing person and so witty. No one blames you for doing the steps you have to take to protect yourself. Much love and support.
You don’t know me, I’m just a little NA fantasy writer poking her way into the world, but your blog has brought me joy, it’s educated me and it’s comforted me when I’ve felt unsure of myself. You’ve had a huge positive impact on me, and it kills me to see this all playing out. You are amazing, and I want you to know you have my support going forward. Keep being awesome, you do what you have to to look after yourself. <3
You gotta do what you gotta do to be able to do what you gotta do. 🙂
I gave up FaceBook because there is a LOT of high school angsty-wangsty bullshit around social media platforms, and honestly? That’s why I worked hard to graduate — to get away from that bullshit.
So rest up, take care of you, and keep on being you. Focus on signal, ignore the noise. 🙂