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Month: April 2017

State of The Trout: Plagiarism and Other Stuff Edition

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Hey there everyone! I want to thank, thank, thank all of you for helping get the plagiarized version of my book taken down across so many platforms. It’s incredible how I can count on you guys to have my back. I’m really touched.

On that subject, I found out that the Amazon version of the plagiarized book only made five whole dollars, and that because the distributor is operated by Macmillan I would have to go to them for compensation. I’m still deciding whether or not I want to bother going after money that small. The practical part of me says no, don’t do that, it’s not even worth the five bucks to even write the email. The petty, vindictive part of me says to lawyer up and sue for that money just to put the plagiarist through a mountain of hassle on principal. I’m leaning toward the former.

In other news, Say Goodbye To Hollywood is now available at Barnes & Noble and iBooks.

In other other news, tune in here on Wednesday. I’m going to show you how to make a waffle.

The Big Damn Buffy Rewatch S03E18, “Earshot”

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CW: SUICIDE

In every generation, there is a chosen one. She alone would appreciate it if Netflix would stop getting rid of shows she likes. She will also recap every episode of Buffy The Vampire Slayer with an eye to the following themes:

  1. Sex is the real villain of the Buffy The Vampire Slayer universe.
  2. Giles is totally in love with Buffy.
  3. Joyce is a fucking terrible parent.
  4. Willow’s magic is utterly useless (this one won’t be an issue until season 2, when she gets a chance to become a witch)
  5. Xander is a textbook Nice Guy.
  6. The show isn’t as feminist as people claim.
  7. All the monsters look like wieners.
  8. If ambivalence to possible danger were an Olympic sport, Team Sunnydale would take the gold.
  9. Angel is a dick.
  10. Harmony is the strongest female character on the show.
  11. Team sports are portrayed in an extremely negative light.
  12. Some of this shit is racist as fuck.
  13. Science and technology are not to be trusted.
  14. Mental illness is stigmatized.
  15. Only Willow can use a computer.
  16. Buffy’s strength is flexible at the plot’s convenience.
  17. Cheap laughs and desperate grabs at plot plausibility are made through Xenophobia.
  18. Oz is the Anti-Xander
  19. Spike is capable of love despite his lack of soul
  20. Don’t freaking tell me the vampires don’t need to breathe because they’re constantly out of frickin’ breath.
  21. The foreshadowing on this show is freaking amazing.
  22. Smoking is evil.
  23. Despite praise for its positive portrayal of non-straight sexualities, some of this shit is homophobic as fuck.
  24. How do these kids know all these outdated references, anyway?
  25. Technology is used inconsistently as per its convenience in the script.
  26. Sunnydale residents are no longer shocked by supernatural attacks.
  27. Casual rape dismissal/victim blaming a-go-go
  28. Snyder believes Buffy is a demon or other evil entity.
  29. The Scoobies kind of help turn Jonathan into a bad guy.
  30. This show caters to the straight/bi female gaze like whoa.
  31. Sunnydale General is the worst hospital in the world.
  32. Faith is hyper-sexualized needlessly.
  33. Slut shame!
  34. The Watchers have no fucking clue what they’re doing.
  35. Vampire bites, even very brief ones, are 99.8% fatal.
  36. Economic inequality is humorized and oversimplified.

Have I missed any that were added in past recaps? Let me know in the comments.  Even though I might forget that you mentioned it.

WARNING: Some people have mentioned they’re watching along with me, and that’s awesome, but I’ve seen the entire series already and I’ll probably mention things that happen in later seasons. So… you know, take that under consideration, if you’re a person who can’t enjoy something if you know future details about it.

Dear “Lilly”

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Hello, Lilly. I don’t know who you are. I hope very much that we have never and will never meet. I don’t know why you did what you did, but I do know that “your” book, Submitting To My Boss is a word-for-word copy of my book, The Boss. Come to think of it, maybe you should also hope very much that we never meet. Because I don’t take too kindly to frauds and cheats.

The thing is, you didn’t just steal from me. You also stole Ava Violet’s She’s With Me from Wattpad and released it as “your” book. You didn’t even bother to change the title. And in what is perhaps the cruelest move of all, you used another author’s name to create brand confusion as a cover for your crime and to sell the books you stole. You named yourself Lilly Kate, just one letter off from legitimate author Lily Kate. You set her up to take the fall for you when you got caught. You even stole her bio and claimed to be a USA Today bestseller.

You’re not. You didn’t earn it. Lily Kate earned it with her novel, Delivery GirlI earned it with my first novel. We are USA Today bestselling authors. Not you.

Again, I don’t know who you are. All I know is that you stole from me, you stole from Lily Kate, and you stole from Ava Violet. You took books that Violet and I offered for free and decided that you were entitled to make money off them. You decided that you deserved to profit off intellectual property that you had no claim to and that we weren’t profiting from, ourselves. You’re not a real author. You’re a con artist. You not only stole from all three of us, you charged readers 99¢ for books they didn’t have to pay for.

I hope that one of the companies you published “your” books through will provide me with the information I need to take legal action against you. So, I take it back. I hope very much that we do meet. When I see you in court.

Sincerely,
The wrong author to try this on

Spring Break Blog Hiatus

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I completely overestimated my ability to get work done while my eight-year-old, who has just discovered a karaoke app for her tablet, is on Spring Break. True Blood Tuesday, Big Damn Writer Advice Column, and Buffy is suspended until next week. Pray for me. The forecast calls for rain every day this week. I can’t even send the kids outside.